I Fear You Have Too Much Time On Your Hands

Sadie woke us up in the middle of the night to let us know that she suddenly had an extreme fear of pirates. Ok, I can understand that. The pirate image is pretty intimidating.
The next morning I sat her down and explained what a pirate is in modern times and that unless she planned on being on a boat in the middle of the ocean, she is probably not going to come across one.
Later that day she came to me with another extreme fear that she needed to discuss. Air ducts. She never wants to crawl through one.

Thank You, Soldiers!

We are so very grateful for the men and women who serve our country every day. We are also grateful for their families who let them go. What a blessing it is to live in this country.
Today we are happy to celebrate Memorial Day by taking time to remember what their sacrifice has meant for so many. Thank you, Soldiers!

They Just Need a Good Washing

I have been sick for the last two months. Luckily, after a ton of co-pays and a lot of trial and error, we are starting to figure out how I can feel better. As I am figuring out a new diet and what my body can handle, I still occasionally have reactions that come with a few different symptoms and send me back to bed.
Yesterday was one of those days. Brady found me in bed and said,
"Mom, your eyes are dirty. They are all black around them. (Dark circles) What you need to do is take them out and stick them in the washing machine. That will make them all better."

Yeah, you know the circles are bad when your three year old notices them and wants to scrub them off.

I'm Seeing a Pattern Here

Me: "Brady, please clean up this mess you made."
Brady: "Mom! Why haven't you cleaned up this mess I made?"

Too Old for Spanking

This morning Sadie declared;
"Mom, I will be 7 in 4 months. I am too old for spanking. Your only choice now is to send me to my room. I don't mind much though, because my favorite toy is in my room. My favorite toy is my mind, so you can't even take that away. I love to think."

A Trait of the "Y" Chromosome

Me: "Brady, please pick up this big mess you just made."
Brady: "Sorry, I don't know how. I am a brother."

"Final" Countdown

Me: "Kids, we have to leave here in 7 minutes."

Me: "Kids, we have to leave here in 4 minutes."

Me: "Kids, we are leaving in 2 minutes."

Me: "Ok, kids, we are leaving right now. Let's go."

Sadie and Brady (Simultaneously): "Mom! I have to go to the bathroom!"

Me: O_o

On Display

Brady and I were sitting in the waiting room of the doctor's office, (waiting for the doctor to look at his very bruised, very swollen foot), looking at the very large fish tank. The fish tank there would be big enough for an adult to comfortably stand in with most of his head under water.
Brady said, "Mommy, I want to take all of my clothes off and get in to the fish tank. I need to go swimming with those little fishies."
I responded, "Brady, then you would be a naked little boy swimming with the fishies."

He giggled for the next two hours.

That Does Sound Uncomfortable

Brady: "Mom! My lips are chopped."
Me: "What?"
Brady: "My lips are chopped, they hurt."
Me: "Oh!! Did you need chopstick?"
Brady: "Yes!"

Do You See Her Now?

Brady: (yelling) "Sadie! Stop pushing me! Mom, tell Sadie to stop pushing me!"

Me: ...blank stare...

Does my son need psychiatric help, or has he figured out how to get his sister in trouble? Sadie is no where in sight...

Not Usually

Brady: "Mom, are you thinking what I'm thinking?"
Me: "Um, I don't know. What are you thinking?"
Brady: "I am thinking about dump trucks."

Change of Scenery

Brady has a very weird habit. About half way through a roll of toilet paper he gets tired of it and puts on a new roll. It's kind of an expensive habit. : P

You Do the Math

Math doesn't seem to work the same in my house as it does in other places.
Here is a story problem that I can't seem to figure out;
One mommy washes, dries, and folds five loads of laundry. This mommy asks three very obedient children to take the laundry up to their room and put it away.
The next day, the three very obedient children come to the mommy and tell her that they have no clean clothes to wear to school.

There were no break-ins overnight.

Please choose one of the following answers;
A: The monster under their beds ate all of the clothes.
B: Mommy decided to sneak in their rooms last night and wear every piece of clothing that they own.
C: They never did put the clothing away. They chose to throw it on their floors and spread it about in order to more thoroughly create the look of "disaster".